Happysad. The paradoxical mixture of joy, pride, and melancholy that happens when we stand in the intersection where one season of life is finishing and another starting.
Weddings are such a moment. Celebration of Life services might be another.
Graduation from high school is another.
Facebook is teeming with moments celebrating graduating seniors, most of them by moms. Pictures of babies now grown. Pictures of caps, gowns, and smiling young people. Brags and boasts on the awesomeness of their child. This is exactly how it should be. We all know that they were not always awesome, were sometimes downright awful, and that we had plenty of not- so- great parent moments. But, come the end of May and the end of their final school season, we set all of that aside and shout to the world our pride in our kids.
The transition from high school to “next” is a big one and needs to be celebrated. More than most things, it seems to signify that childhood is complete and adulthood starts. Now, we all know that is not true, but try telling that to our hearts. Right?
As I see the posts out there, I also hear the cry of a heart that is putting on a brave face because while you ARE truly celebrating, your heart hurts too. You’ve done a great job raising that child into a young adult. Your job is far from over (Amen, anyone?) but it is changing. Your bird is leaving the nest and you are the wind that is helping this process. That hurts just a little bit, all in a good way.
When a friend reached out to say, “I’m feeling a little down today,” I remembered what my own momma’s heart experienced when my boys graduated from high school.
There just isn’t another way to put it. I was filled with joy and happiness, and enjoying the celebration while the rogue tear slipped down my cheek. Truly proud of the young men my boys had become and yet wondering, When on earth did this happen? Excited and ready for them to move on while desperately wanting to hang on to that little boy who still needed his momma.
You know what I mean, don’t you?
It is easy to get caught up in our own lives and forget that someone is lonely today in their happiness. My friend’s call reminded me to reach out to my other momma friends who have seniors graduating this month and simply ask, How are you doing today?Someone needs to hear from you today to know they are not alone. Even in their happiness. Click To Tweet
Those posts are from a momma with a heart that is simultaneously bursting with pride and silently breaking. If you know one of these momma’s – call her today and say I’m thinking about you. Text her today and ask her how she’s doing. Hug her neck the next time you see her to let her know that you know. You don’t even have to say anything.
You may not necessarily know the feeling of a graduating senior but you know the feeling of happysad. You know the feeling of joy tinged with poignant melancholy.
Reach out and forge that bond that lets someone else know they aren’t alone today. Be happysad with them.